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Eric: Sammy was eating a sandwich? Not a biscuit? Come *on...*

(From Melonpool Click on the thumbnail for full sized gastrointestinal invocation.)

Submitted without comment.

(Well, except that I am really tired. As it worked out, I dropped Weds off last night, and only got out of the Boston area at one AM. It was thick and foggy, and I found myself blurring in vision after a while. You know the kind of blurring I'm talking about -- it's the kind where you discover you've drifted out of your lane, which means you were probably actually asleep for a second or two. Which scares you, but not enough to get adrenalin flowing so you wake back up. So, I pulled into a rest area and slept for 20-30 minutes.)

(Yeah, I had coffee. It didn't dent the fatigue. Too many days of driving, I think.)

(Anyway, so today I sleptwalked through work, and now I'm home marking time and trying to stay away.)

(Anyway, this was cute. I like the idea of "snark" being a rude horking sound made by a giant hamster while he eats.)

(It's still a little weird to be a "media outlet," though.)

(Anyway. It was cute and fun. Though, you know. Metahumor.)

(I should sleep, shouldn't I?)

Posted by Eric Burns-White at June 30, 2005 5:44 PM


Comment from: SeanH posted at June 30, 2005 6:59 PM

Microsleep - sleeping for a second or so before jerking awake - is the bane of my life. I tend to accumulate heavy sleep debt if I have to observe normal human working hours, waking up at 7am and such. After a week or two of that, I'm falling into microsleep at my desk every afternoon. This is one of the (many) reasons I don't drive.

Comment from: Misha Grin posted at June 30, 2005 8:04 PM

I still prefer to think of it as a beast to sought with thimbles and care...

And if YOU disagree?!

*brandishes a railway share at you*

So there.

Comment from: Tangent posted at June 30, 2005 8:18 PM

What's this?

A comic strip?


Websnark snarks web comics?


Just teasing ya. :D

Rob H.

Comment from: kirabug posted at June 30, 2005 9:19 PM

What I want to know is whether I was the first to spot the snarkbait or whether Melonpool is on your trawl normally and you beat me to it :)

Comment from: 32_footsteps posted at June 30, 2005 10:28 PM

Well, if nothing else, it is in the trawl for the Daily Grind Iron Man Challenge... don't know precisely when Eric checks that one, though.

Comment from: siwangmu posted at June 30, 2005 11:20 PM

Yeah, because no one knows what Eric reads nowadays, because the carbon-dating results for his trawl lists are still at the lab.

::pointed stare::

Sorry, I would just totally love to see a more current list. Are you sure you couldn't be persuaded to at least drag off the literal list of links in your toolbar? I understand that you would much, much rather get to explain what each strip is, whether it belongs there, etc., etc., but if you try to do that we'll never get a new trawl!

Appease my curiosity!

It's not like you don't live to make me happy, you know.

Comment from: kirabug posted at July 1, 2005 12:08 AM

siwangmu, the fact that you used no less than eight points to put the point on your pointed stare cracked me up.

Comment from: siwangmu posted at July 1, 2005 4:39 AM

Wow, kirabug... I am so much more awesome than I realized.

Also, this is a really strange thing to comment on, but I saw this again, and... "sleptwalked?" That just doesn't sound right. I'm not saying we should always apply grammatical changes only at the end of our conglomo-words, or else I'd have to live with passerbys when I much prefer passersby, but making both parts of the word past tense is weeeird. Couldn't it be argued that sleepwalking (and no, I have no idea if that should in fact be hyphenated or something, that's not what's interesting me) is a kind of walking, i.e. sleep is functioning as an adjective? Like powerwalking, whatever that is. You wouldn't say "I poweredwalked." Although it'd be pretty funny if you did.

And yet, "I sleepwalked" sounds odd to me too. You could cheat by saying "I was sleepwalking through work," I suppose, but I am dissatisfied with my grammatical options. Someone who knows stuff about English, save me from my distress!

(Or, if I'm the only person who cares, ignore this and talk about the topic)

Comment from: SeanH posted at July 1, 2005 7:17 AM

siwangmu: I think the only answer is "I somnambulated".

Comment from: Chris Anthony posted at July 1, 2005 8:10 AM

Curse you, SeanH, you beat me to it.

("Somnambulate" is one of my favorite words - I find it evocative, for some reason.)

Comment from: Dragonmuncher posted at July 1, 2005 8:36 PM

Has everyone been following the Queen of Wands "Director's Commentary" stuff? Even though technically this stuff isn't new, I'm still hoping for a snark... QoW is awesome, and notes by Aerie make it more so.

Plus, it's just so PRETTY.

Comment from: Misha Grin posted at July 2, 2005 3:59 AM

I agree. Somnambulate is a great word. However, I would put forward one better:


Just because it is SO completely random and archaic, *AND* because there is a major historical event called "The Defenestration of Prague." I am NOT making this stuff up, folks!

Comment from: Chris Anthony posted at July 2, 2005 8:47 AM

The problem, Misha, is that in my experience "defenestrate" is everybody's favorite Weird Word, to the point where I can't walk two miles without hearing it used somewhere. It might just be the people I tend to encounter, but unfortunately "defenestrate" has long since gone on my list of "I wouldn't argue if I never heard these words again", simply by dint of overuse.

I'd be hard-pressed to find a favorite word, although the "direction-place" words, now archaic, are up there: whence ("from where" - yes, "from whence" is redundant), thither ("to there"), hence ("from here"), and the rest of the gang.

Oh, and - from another thread - it's "bated breath", not "baited". But I digress.

Comment from: 32_footsteps posted at July 2, 2005 9:44 AM

Heck, "defenestrate" was on my college dorm's list of rules. Specifically, one place simply said "no defenestration." It became a running joke in the dorms.

I personally like "anthropomorphic," "matriculate," opprobrium," "imbroglio," "stymie," and "jejune." Those are six words you wouldn't see as the backbone of a sestina, I promise you that.

Comment from: larksilver posted at July 2, 2005 9:48 AM

Dragonmuncher.. he already did a snark of the Queen of Wands reruns. Actually, he's mentioned them several times, recently. Due to their extreme awesomeness of course.

And kirabug? Melonpool's one of the comics that was in the Trawl, I think. And since he's snarked Melonpool before, numerous times.. I figure he probably saw the snarkage all on his own. hehe

Comment from: kirabug posted at July 2, 2005 10:03 AM

Darn darn darn darn.

My favorite words are much more simple, but fun to say anyway:





yeah, i'm boring :)

Comment from: Chris Anthony posted at July 2, 2005 3:25 PM

32_footsteps, some might take that as a challenge...

kira, I do have to agree that all of those are good words. :) (Especially "bucket". It just sounds fun.)

Comment from: SeanH posted at July 2, 2005 7:08 PM

Well, "defenestrate" was fun when I first learned it at, what, thirteen? Fourteen? We learned it in History class. As Misha references, it was once in certain parts of Europe an accepted form of political succession. Important officials being ejected from high windows everywhere you went in Prague. Terrible. But yes, Chris, it's overused.

"Whence" still exists in German, as woher. Whither is wohin.

Comment from: 32_footsteps posted at July 2, 2005 11:05 PM

Well, Chris, if anyone thinks they can do a good sestina (and I mean one that obeys the rules of grammar throughout), then I'll give that person full credit in a review. Granted, not on Websnark, but I'll be kind enough to post a link to it in this comment thread.

Comment from: Phil Kahn posted at July 3, 2005 1:44 AM

Yes. Sleep.

Comment from: siwangmu posted at July 3, 2005 7:34 AM

::takes a deep breath::

I am the most pathetic person on the planet.

Also, I took the liberty of changing stymie to stymied, because it's just so much more common a usage and so much more natural for a line ending in English...

I will note that this is not a good sestina and I'm not at all certain it obeys the laws of grammar throughout. But this is what happens when Eric stops snarking sufficiently. We all go MAD!

Also, the "meter" is absolute rubbish. If it helps, be warned that a lot of the lines have a few unstressed syllables before the first beat so's to make 'em flow better.


My High School blitheness now incurs opprobium,

from me, at least. I ne'er saw my imbroglio.

My hobbies, I'm afraid, were all jejune;

and, by my future prospects never stymied,

I gobbled up cartoons anthropomorphic

and never pondered my need to matriculate.

I fear it's true: soon I too would matriculate

and I could never face my own opprobium

(as if in a stand-off: comically anthropomorphic,

don't you agree?) if I could not resolve the imbroglio

which I was embroiled in, and, therefore, stymied,

I faced a terrible choice 'tween germaine and jejune.

Why would I deem my own pastimes jejune?

I'd need cleverness more than cartoonish cliche to matriculate

somwhere where my mind would be challenged. And so, I was stymied,

ashamed to face, as I feared, the fierce world's opprobrium,

and I aimed to embrace an immediate escape from imbroglio,

by abandoning preoccupations anthropomorphic.

Why lay so much stress on the issue of anthropomorphic

creations? My goals had to change. No more my jejune

activities could I pursue, or my wretched imbroglio,

on how to prepare for my quest to proudly matriculate,

would practically predate me: prey to my pricked pride's opprobrium,

I'd find myself tied, in a bind, out of time, behind, stymied.

I stood still and took stock but, stagnating, found myself stymied.

How could I give up my beloved tales anthropomorphic,

without feeling like I'd deserve my own heroes' opprobrium?

We, they argued, are anything but your malnourished "jejune."

We grant wisdom and honor! No matter where you matriculate,

our stories will carry you through every new imbroglio.

Have you so soon forgotten Mariel of Redwall's imbroglio?

Have your vole, mouse and bird heroes ever, when they've felt most stymied,

as you do, admittedly, over your need to matriculate,

been stopped by the fact they're, after all, anthropomorphic

from choosing the hard duty over the pleasures jejune?

Astonished, I stopped. Such startlingly stern opprobrium!

My anthropomorphic-induced imbroglio ended.

Though I'd thought I was stymied, and all my endeavors jejune,

my opprobrium-bred motivation brought me to matriculate.

(in case it makes no sense, it's supposedly about needing to study up for SATs and such for college but not wanting to lose time with favored furry fiction (ack! Alliteration! Attacking!) This is not so much realistic, since I, at least, learned more words reading than I ever even tried to learn from "studying," but, dammit, I had weird words to work with.)

Comment from: siwangmu posted at July 3, 2005 7:43 AM

For kirabug:

There once was a moose from Nantucket

who wanted to live in a bucket

but he soon realized

it was more weasel-sized

and, thusly defeated, said "F*** it."

Comment from: Paul Gadzikowski posted at July 3, 2005 9:14 AM

But this is what happens when Eric stops snarking sufficiently. We all go MAD!
You know, Eric, it's one thing for you to decline to post to the whims of an unreasonably demanding readership, and it's another to deviate from your normal contact habits when people know you have significant health problems. In lieu of a real post a quick shout out would be nice. I'm just sayin'.

Comment from: Wednesday posted at July 3, 2005 11:53 AM

Well, if it helps things in the meantime: Eric is fine, just unusually exhausted. (One of the problems with doing a lot of things in Boston at night is that it's two hours or so each way.) So he's been recovering from that, which doesn't leave a lot of opportunity for lucid writing. Blame me.

Comment from: Dave Van Domelen posted at July 3, 2005 12:14 PM

Wait, since when do we require LUCID writing?

Comment from: Paul Gadzikowski posted at July 3, 2005 12:16 PM

Thanks, Wednesday.

Comment from: Wednesday posted at July 3, 2005 12:46 PM

No problem.

(I'd have filled in for him myself if I hadn't been, y'know, similarly exhausted, plus jet lagged.)

Comment from: Tangent posted at July 3, 2005 2:05 PM

Ah huh. Exhausted. Mmmhmm...

Well, I suppose all that... walking around would exhaust the two of you. Definitely.

Meh. I'm no good with double entrendres (or however you spell that word).

Hope you two catch up on your sleep. Take care :)

Robert A. Howard, currently working on a mega-Narbonics review


Comment from: quiller posted at July 3, 2005 4:18 PM

Well we knew Eric needed some sleep, just didn't expect him to be sleeping for 3 days. That's some exhaustion right there. (Perhaps he is catching up on paying work as well?)

Comment from: SeanH posted at July 3, 2005 4:43 PM

So, Eric's doing the Jesus thing, huh? And we're awaiting the Resurrection Snark.

Comment from: Kate Sith posted at July 3, 2005 5:18 PM

Ah huh. Exhausted. Mmmhmm...

Jeebus, you people are worse than my mom (not just you, Tangent, but yours was the quote that was handy). Can't a male and a female carry on a platonic friendship anymore without all this scrutiny? Sure, they work together. Sure, they've been hanging out. But my GOD, dudes, give 'em a break.

Not everything is about pairings, you know!

::huff!:: Fen.

Comment from: gwalla posted at July 3, 2005 7:31 PM

Kate Sith: Rob is a fanficcer. Everything is about pairings.

Comment from: Matt Blackwell posted at July 3, 2005 8:18 PM

So does that mean we're about to be subjected to a barrage of E/W fics?

Comment from: Tangent posted at July 3, 2005 8:47 PM

*shrug* Personally I don't care one way or the other. It's just amusing to tease about it. Considering I've had insomnia for the past few days (my fault, I've long had a nocturnal schedule and I'm trying to switch to a more human sleeping schedule, even if it means not staying up 'til 2 a.m. to read comic updates fresh), I can fully understand the exhaustion.

And no, I doubt I'd write fics about Eric and Weds. I don't know enough about them to properly characterize them, and that's what gets me in a ficcing mood. :P

Rob H., procrastinating on that review

Comment from: kirabug posted at July 3, 2005 9:29 PM

siwangmu, *love* the limerick :) may i reprint it on my site?

east coast weather's been heavy on the humidity this week and only just broke (in PA) yesterday. exhaustion is the norm for the right-hand coasters. wouldn't be surprised if this contributed to eric's situation as well.

Wednesday, my sister's in Scotland right now, which makes me curious - where in the British isles are you?

Comment from: Wednesday posted at July 3, 2005 9:33 PM

Kira: Thames Valley.

Comment from: siwangmu posted at July 4, 2005 1:14 AM

Sure, kirabug! I'm glad you liked it. I was in a silly mood. Also, if you can figure out any way to punctuate the damn thing, feel free to do so, because nothing I tried made me happy.

Does anyone else think it's hilarious that apparently the pairing in question has inherent grossness? 'Cuz I mean, E/W.

Comment from: Wednesday posted at July 4, 2005 12:13 PM

Well, it could be W/E, which is just absurdly cute.

Frankly, I'm not sure where I stand on the subject of people writing fic about us. Do we get to be Sues? Is it the coy kind of bad fic where both of us sound like the author making metacommentary, except for when we're making the sorts of lascivious comments that actual people never make? Does it violate canon?

Comment from: Wednesday posted at July 4, 2005 12:15 PM

Oh, and do I also get to bone Snape? And is it Rickman Snape?

Comment from: Wednesday posted at July 4, 2005 12:17 PM

Hm. Now that I think about it, that sort of thing being what it is, we'd have to fight over Snape and then he'd prefer, like, some other guy in the Potterverse anyhow. Like, uh, that guy. With the hair. Yeah.

The other thing I'm worried about: neither of us have to be Lilim, do we?

Comment from: 32_footsteps posted at July 4, 2005 12:22 PM

Well, as they say, when the cat's away, the mice will play.

I must admit, siwangmu, you pulled it off. This Thursday, I'll give you full credit. How do you wish to be identified? I'm going to go with your screen name here if you don't mention any other preference.

Comment from: kirabug posted at July 4, 2005 3:49 PM

Is it the coy kind of bad fic where both of us sound like the author making metacommentary, except for when we're making the sorts of lascivious comments that actual people never make? Does it violate canon?

I'm picturing something written in a bad "who's line is it anyway" film noir style now. greaaat.

and if you're violating cannons, i suspect it'll be r-rated film noir. interesting.

siwangmu, thanks! :)

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